Everywhere we turn these days, we hear and read about others who have figured out, and want to share, the secrets to creating our dream lifestyles, live the way we want to live and so on.

There are books and seminars galore promising to share these secrets with you, for a nice fee that is. Often, it’s the fees from these seminars and books that are affording those people their new dream lifestyles. But that’s not the point.

The fact is, there are a few things you need to know in order to create the lifestyle you say your really want:

1) What lifestyle DO you really want, and

2) Is this lifestyle one you can and want to support?

The first question is obvious because if you don’t know where you’re going, you’ll never get there. We teach this principles in our Camp Millionaire programs.

 

The second question is the most important one and it’s the one people not only forget to ask themselves; they don’t even consider it.

When working with teens who often have starry eyes when it comes to growing up and living ‘the dream’, they talk about big, fancy homes and expensive cars and lots of toys and vacations and clothes, and…you get the picture. Heck, there are a huge number of adults who still think they want this stuff.

When it comes right down to knowing yourself and getting a feel for what really matters and what you really want for yourself, it’s often more about comfort, convenience, ease, enjoyment, satisfaction and well, a little love and joy thrown in makes a nice finish touch.

The Reality of Fancy Lifestyles

Now there’s nothing wrong with wanting to live a certain way or have certain things…if you’re willing to work to support it. The challenge with most people I’ve coaches is that their dream lifestyle isn’t congruent with their willingness to work to support it. In other words, they just don’t want to work that hard to support the things they thought they wanted.

What happens next is they either realize they don’t want that lifestyle or they admit to themselves they aren’t willing to do what it takes to support it. Either way, they are now stepping into their REAL lifestyle reality and this is the beginning of financial happiness and contentment.

I met with a man last year who is a millionaire about possibly using The Money Game in his programs and one of the first questions he asked me was, “Are you a millionaire?” I said, No. He asked me why not? I replied, “You know, it’s not what I’m aiming for…being a millionaire doesn’t mean much to me. Having a simple lifestyle that doesn’t require thousands of dollars to support every month so I can do this ‘financial literacy’ thing that moves me does mean something to me.”

He wasn’t really sure how to take all of that. But I am serious…it’s really what I want. Why? Because it’s so much easier to support than having a big old house (rent or own), a new fancy car and a bunch of stuff I don’t need.

The older I get, the simpler I want it and I know I’m not alone. I’ve talked to many of you my age (54ish:) and I’m hearing the same story told in many different ways. Luckily I’ve known this about myself for a long time so have structured my life in such a way as to afford the things that are really important…like getting away for periods of time.

If you noticed in the paragraph above I said, ‘my life affords me’, instead of, ‘me affording my life’.

Teens and Lifestyle Reality Checks

So, if you’re the parents of a teen with high hopes and grandiose ideas about how life is going to look when he/she grows up, an educational reality check can do wonders to help prepare them for what they will have to do to support their dreams.

And by all means, support their dreams. Be positive, do NOT roll your eyes at them, do NOT tell them to ‘get real’ or anything else that may cause them to think they can’t have what they really want…because they really can. It’s your job to show them how and let THEM make the final decision…a decision that moves them in whatever direction they want with clear eyes and a vision for what it’s going to take.

Start out the conversation by asking your teen if he has thought about how he wants to live when he gets to be an adult. If he has, ask him if he’d like you to help him see what it will look like financially on paper. Get all the details you can….let him go wild with details: what, where, when, color, size, etc.

When you have it down, make a list and start doing the research to determine:

1) What it’s going to take to buy those things, and

2) What it’s going to take to support those things.

We’ve all thought we wanted a certain something until we, or someone else, figured out what it was going to cost and take to support. All of a sudden, you just don’t want that thing as much as you thought.

Let this be a fun project you do with your kids, either as a family project or one to one with each child. Make sure it’s a positive, uplifting activity…remember, your job as the parent or guardian isn’t to talk them out of anything, it’s to help show them the numbers, put dreams down in dollars and then let them make choices based on reality instead of unthoughtout dreams.

Lastly, remember that we all have dreams and without them, we’d never get anywhere. Where would we be today if Martin Luther King hadn’t had a dream? Or Steve Jobs or …

Enjoy..