by Elisabeth Donati | Jan 3, 2017 | Financial Articles for Adults/Couples, Financial Education Articles for Women, WEALTHwork™
Yup…it’s yet another New Year to ponder. I wanted to wait until you got most of the “Make this year your best year ever” emails before I sent this one out. I’m sure you’ve rolled your eyes several times already so I thought perhaps I’d give you a few completely unique tips to apply to your financial life.
These are some of the questions the financial gurus often ask you to ponder:
- Where are you now?
- Where do you want to be next year at this time?
- What’s it going to take?
- Are you ready to commit to making it happen?
The following 5 steps, however, as a bit different. Why? Because your financial situation is as much an inside job as it is learning and applying new financial habits in your life. Just as the quality of the apples on an apple tree has to do with the health of the tree’s roots, the quality of your external financial situation has everything to do with your mental financial roots (aka, belief systems).
If you’re one of the many people in the United States who need a financial makeover, here are five very effective, though unusual, steps you can take to start you down a happier, more prosperous road through 2017.
Step One:
Begin each day with gratitude. Take two minutes first thing in the morning, over your coffee, tea, green drink, smoothie or hot chocolate, to experience gratitude for things in your life: your situation, your family, your experiences, your opportunities to learn, your health, your partner, your toothbrush. Whatever it is…just think about, and FEEL, grateful for as many things in your life as you can in two minutes. To add an additional level of awareness to this process, keep a gratitude journal by your bed or on your kitchen table…whatever is easiest to turn into a habit and write in it every day…if even just for a minute.
Note: If a fancy journal makes it easier for you to write, simply type ‘gratitude journal’ into Amazon and take your pick!
Step Two:
Start keeping a money journal. Not just for spending but for anything and everything related to money: saving money, investing money, expenses, purchases, why/when you use cash vs debit card vs credit card, thoughts you have about money (THIS is a biggy). This money journal doesn’t have to be fancy or laid out in any particular way, just start writing your money activities down…all of them! It’s only when we are aware of what we’re doing or thinking that we can then set out to modify what we’re doing or thinking in order to bring us a different financial experience.
Note: It usually takes at least two normal weeks (i.e., no company, holidays, vacations, etc.) before you start seeing your spending patterns. You know, the ones you need to change. If you really want to make some changes, keep the journal for a least a month. And if you REALLY, REALLY want to change, keep the journal going always.
Step Three:
Figure out how staying in your current financial position serves you. You heard me correctly…why might you not want to change? There is a saying that goes like this:
“People don’t change until the pain of change is less than the pain of staying the same.”
Believe it or not, many human beings don’t really WANT to change because to change often requires compromises, effort, letting go of some things, etc. and for whatever reason, some people are unwilling to change even though they give lip-service to wanting a different life.
Human beings hold very deep-seated beliefs when it comes to money (and everything else for that matter) and those beliefs literally control everything we do in regard to money. When you can’t seem to change what you’re doing, figuring out what keeps you stuck where you are is a very good thing indeed.
Doing daily introspective work using a journal, talking to a best friend or even hiring a money coach can help you sort out what’s at the heart of your money issues.
Note: Even if don’t have money issues, you do have money beliefs that are important that you understand. You never know when a negative belief might just rear its ugly head and cause problems for you.
Step Four:
Figure out how improving your financial situation would change your life. Make a list of how things are now and how they would be if you made, or had, more money.
Now, ask yourself this profound question:
“Can I change how I think and feel to experience the life I want this very instant?”
I know it seems like a strange question, but the fact is, you CAN change your experience of life in a heartbeat of a second…if you can learn how to change your MIND about your experience.
Here’s a great book that I highly recommend…The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. It’s not about money…it’s about something a whole lot deeper. And when you can see life at a deeper, and different, level, you begin to look at everything differently…especially money!
You see, I have been involved with money and people (most of them little, but still) since 2002. I have noticed that money makes people crazy in so many ways. I have noticed that there are people WITH money who are always upset about their financial situation and people with a lot less money who seem sane, happy and satisfied.
Learning to look at money, your life, and life in general a little bit differently can go a long way toward bringing you a little bit of peace around your money situation. Just something to think about…
Step Five:
Figure out how to make doing your money differently a PRIORITY, because if you don’t, you will never change your financial situation.
The fact is, unless something is a priority to you, you just won’t focus on it. You won’t pay attention to it. You won’t do what you need to do in order to get where you say you want to go.
Think about all of the things you do each day…the things you always do no matter what. Why do you do these things? Exactly…because they are a priority to you.
Developing new money habits is one of the requirements for having a new, and improved, financial life. And as soon as you make improving your financial situation a priority, you’ll make developing new money habits a priority and you’ll be off and running.
In summary…I’d venture to say that this list of five steps is probably a little different than other articles you’ve read. While the other lists give you a lot of great financial to-dos, it doesn’t help you develop the neccessary foundation for change if you’re truly tired of your current financial situation and would like to have 2017 be different.
If you’re ready to make a change, you have options:
- Start reading books about money. Any and all books, especially books about belief systems such as The Secrets of the Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker. Just visit your local library and start checking out financial books. Would will be surprised at how quickly you start to figure out what you need to do.
- Next, start attending any and all local workshops, seminars or other group events you can attend. You might only pick up one little tidbit, however, those tidbits will add up to a great education quicker than you think.
- Lastly, consider hiring a money coach. Yours truly is available and happy to help you make the necessary changes and take the needed steps to get you moving toward your financial goals. Just give me a call at 805-957-1024 or send me an email at Elisabeth@innerwealthpublishing.com. It would be an honor to assist you!
Happy New Year!
by Elisabeth Donati | Jan 14, 2013 | Financial Literacy, Financial Literacy Principles, Latest News, Uncategorized, WEALTHwork™
Everywhere you look, companies are still offering people the opportunity to be irresponsible with their money. Even PayPal has gotten into the ‘credit’ game recently with their new BillMeLater service…but don’t do it and here’s why.
Painful Credit Lessons Don’t Last Long
The past several years has brought a huge percentage of Americans to their knees financially. The continued wrongful use of credit cards and the ‘mortgage’ situation should have taught us a thing or two about buying ‘stuff’ with other people’s money, but no…we’re still tempted and enamored by the idea that we can have all the ‘stuff’ we want today and pay for it tomorrow.
STOP THINKING THIS! Thinking that you can pay for things later is what keeps getting this country into the problems it’s in. In the US government only spent money it had, we would NOT be in debt…we couldn’t be.
Think Like People Who HAVE Money
Here’s the thing…
Wealthy, financially free, rich people are wealth, financially free and rich because they practice some very important, and simple, time-tested financial principles. Principles like Pay Yourself First, Put Your Money To Work for You and others.
Paying for stuff with other people’s money isn’t one of those principles.
Question: if you want to learn how to play the flute, do you learn from a concert flutist or a soccer player? I know…stupid question, huh. The fact is, if you want to have money, you MUST do what people who have money do.
In all of our financial literacy programs, we teach participants that the ONLY reason to borrow money (and that’s what using a credit card is) is if you have the opportunity to MAKE money by using it. (Caveat…I’m not talking about an emergency like a medical expense or something life-threatening.)
In other words, borrow money to invest in assets that are going to MAKE you money like rental property, parking lot, a business and other assets that have the opportunity to create a cash flow for you.
I would venture to say that most things paid through PayPal are NOT asset-like!
Financial Principles You Can Thrive By
Two of our Creative Wealth Principles (aka…Rules to The Money Game) that go hand in hand with this financial strategy are as follows:
Only Borrow Money When It’s Going To Make You Money
We’ve already discussed this one…
If You Can’t Afford To Pay Cash For It, You Can’t Afford It At All
This principle is quite simple. If you don’t have the cash, i.e., REAL MONEY, to pay for something right now, you can’t afford it. This is where we need to go back to saving up for things we want to buy. Something happened to the whole idea of delayed gratification years ago when credit cards were introduced. People no longer had to save up for purchases…they just went and bought whatever they wanted…and this was the beginning of what has become a huge issue for a huge percentage of Americans.
What You Can Do
The most important thing you can do is to learn a little self-control and the way you do that is have a big enough WHY for not buying everything you think you want or need.
In other words, learn to tell yourself, “NO, because I’d rather….. (fill in the blank).
Here’s an example of what I’m talking about.
Imagine you’re in your favorite clothing store and you see a shirt that you just have to have. Instead of buying the shirt on impulse, you say to yourself, “Self, I’m not going to buy that shirt because I’d rather feel more secure with an extra $60 in my savings account this month.”
We must learn to look further into the future when it comes to making personal decisions in regard to money, health, relationships. We all want things right now, whether it’s a new iPhone, piece of cheesecake or hugs and kisses. Learning how to best assert personal self-control, i.e., self-disciple, gives you the tools to create the future you keep saying you want for yourself.
WealthWork*
Answer the following sentences and then go look into the nearest mirror and say them to yourself. You won’t believe how powerful you’ll feel.
“I’m not going to buy this today because I’d rather experience……”
“I’m not going to eat this today because I’d rather experience……”
“I’m not going to say _______ to ________ because I’d rather create _________ type of relationship for the long term.”
And feel free to make up a few of your own.
As always, hope this information was valuable. Please leave your comments below and please share this post on your Facebook wall to share with your friends.
Elisabeth
The Financial Literacy Lady
Just helping you think differently about money
www.ElisabethDonati.com
* WealthWork is what wealthy people do in their spare time to create wealth for themselves.
by Elisabeth Donati | Jul 20, 2012 | Financial Literacy, Uncategorized, WEALTHwork™, What you can do
Guest Post by Brian Hamilton, Bestselling Author of 90 Day Money Challenge. Please visit his site for the other 3 reasons budgets don’t work.
Who should handle the budgeting in a marriage? The husband or the wife? The spender or the saver? The nerd or the free spirit? If you want to be wealthy, you need to do what wealthy people do. And their answer is: both of you!
The #4 reason that most budgets don’t work is because you don’t work together with your spouse.
The Budget Committee Meeting (BCM)
If you’re married, it’s time for the BCM: a quick budget meeting with your spouse before every month for the rest of your lives.
You are not taking over the money, your spouse is not taking over the money, you are going to work together and you both have a vote. You are both adults. You’re not daddy taking care of a spoiled little girl or mommy taking care of a little boy and dishing out his allowance; you are two adults working together.
BCM Ground Rules
This meeting should take place at the kitchen table with the TV off.
Nerds:
1. Do a rough draft of the budget
2. Bring it to the meeting
3. Be quiet (all of your opinions are on the page)
4. Make it brief
5. Let the free spirit change something (you’re getting their support when you make it “our” plan)
Free Spirits:
1. Come to the meeting
2. Talk at the meeting and have mature input
3. Agree to every number on the page or vote to change it
4. You can no longer say, “Whatever you want to do” (this is part of having mature input)
A Contract
Once both of you agree on the budget, it’s now a contract for the month. Pinky swear and spit shake that you will both stick to spending the amounts you agreed to at the meeting.
The BCM is the biggest thing that can improve your marriage and stop money fights, assuming you can keep your word and you have integrity. Make each other a promise and keep that promise.
We’ve had a BCM every month since we’ve been married and we’ve never spent any money that wasn’t in the budget without having an EBCM (Emergency BCM) first. That’s where something comes up in the middle of the month and you add an expense to the budget, rebalance it, and agree on it with your spouse before you do the spending.
Warning
If this is the first time you have done a budget with this much detail, I can almost guarantee it’s not going to work out according to your plan. But it does get easier. The first month may take close to an hour, but we now spend about three minutes per month on this (because our budget doesn’t change much anymore).
If you implement the BCM, you’re going to learn to work together in a way you’ve never worked together before and you’re going to see your marriage improve dramatically.
Question: Are you having any trouble getting your spouse on board?
Please leave your comments below.
by Elisabeth Donati | Jul 14, 2011 | Financial Literacy, Latest News, Uncategorized, WEALTHwork™
So there we are, Jan and I this morning, picking beans in my garden. I planted three types: green, yellow and purple. Before you get all excited about the purple ones you need to know they turn green when you cook them. Imagine my disappointment because I love purple.
I had grabbed a metal bowl to put them in and we started picking. And we picked and we picked and we picked. Now mind you, the patch isn’t very big…it’s only about five feet of beans.
Where are all of YOUR beans?
Nonetheless, the longer we picked and the closer we looked, the more beans we saw, and got to pick. (Note: cooked beans are my favorite vegetable.) We just kept commenting on how many there were as compared to how many we thought were there before we starting harvesting them.
We got to thinking how this is a lot like life. The longer, and deeper, we look, listen, feel and experience anything, the more we see, hear, feel or experience that thing.
Of course, the next step is to tie the metaphor into our financial situations…mine, Jan’s, yours. What can we say…it applies, of course.
Counting Your Own Beans
We’ve all heard the nickname bean counters for accountants, bookkeepers, CPA’s. Feel free to tootle over to http://www.word-detective.com/081100.html to check out the brief history of the phrase.
But getting back to your own beans, I have found in my many years of working with people and their money, that they often just need a nudge to stop and look at their situations a little deeper.
How much does it ACTUALLY cost for you to live the lifestyle you’re living?
How much does it ACTUALLY cost to feed your family of four each month?
How much are you ACTUALLY spending on coffee each month?
How much COULD YOU save and invest if you just stopped long enough to get a seriously accurate picture of what you’re making, what you’re spending, what you could save and invest, etc.
Counting Opportunities
The other area I’ve noticed people trip themselves up in is the idea that their opportunities are limited…especially in this economy. Our culture is so stuck on the ‘job’ thing that they often can’t see the 1000’s of opportunities in front of them to start profitable businesses. And no, not knowing how to start a business is not a good enough excuse to keep yourself in the job mentality.
So if you’re struggling financially, even in the slightest, start looking around at all the opportunities there really are for you to make money (not earn it, i.e., trading your time and energy for someone else’s money) on your own.
OK, you’ve got some picking to do. Stop, look, look deeper and then be honest with yourself about what you need to do to make some changes in the way you do money if indeed you really want something better for yourself, like eventually being financially free!
Just something else to think about…
by Elisabeth Donati | Feb 10, 2011 | Financial Literacy, Latest News, Uncategorized, WEALTHwork™, What you can do
Arbitrary Financial Rules of Life: The Cause of Most Suffering
Human beings have a tendency to create arbitrary rules, judgments, classifications, meanings and hence, emotions about the ‘stuff’ of our lives. I’ve heard it said more than once that we’re Meaning Making Machines. And it’s those meanings that we contrive that get us into trouble every day, in more ways than one.
Take the arbitrary rule that families ‘should’ spend holidays together. Who said? And what policeman is going to come arrest you if you decide to go to Cancun some December instead?
Take the arbitrary judgment that rich people are greedy. Who said? And if this is so, why do so many philanthropists exist?
Take the arbitrary classification that if you live in a big house you are rich and if you rent a room in someone’s home and write all day, you are poor. Who said? What if the person living in the room simply wants simple and quiet and the people living in the big house owe more on the house than they have equity in it?
Take the arbitrary meaning that if you’re not totally passionate and happy with what you do for a living, you can’t possibly become rich. Who said? It was only a couple of decades ago (at the most) that human beings decided that we need to “love what we do and the money will follow.” (We talked about this just last week.)
The ideas of wealthy and not wealthy and what it means to be those things is so arbitrary. We all know happy poor people and sad rich people and everything in between.
The following story is a perfect illustration of this idea and I just wanted to share it with you. Enjoy…
STORY FOR YOU…
One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live.
They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.
On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, ‘How was the trip?’
‘It was great, Dad.’
‘Did you see how poor people live?’ the father asked.
‘Oh yeah,’ said the son.
‘So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?’ asked the father.
The son answered:
‘I saw that we have one dog and they had four.
We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.
We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.
Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.
We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.
We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.
We buy our food, but they grow theirs.
We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them.’
The boy’s father was speechless.
Then his son added, ‘Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are.’
End of story…
So you see, as we’ve heard over and over again, life is relative and it’s often only with contrast that you get to see your life compared to someone else’s and see an alternative that you probably didn’t know existed for you.
When people say they ‘can’t’ move or are ‘stuck’, it’s often due to one of three things (or all of those things together):
1) They don’t know there are other options.
2) They are so fearful of change that they won’t choose another option even if they know it exists.
3) They really don’t want the other option badly enough (or goodly enough:-).
Your Wealth Work for today (like homework but better):
1) Look around your world and notice how you classify people, places, things, situations, etc. financially.
2) Ask yourself if those classifications are actually true (most of the time you will find they aren’t).
Financial Stress
3) Notice if those classifications cause you emotional distress in any way, be it comparing you to that other person, place or thing or feeling badly about yourself or negative emotions about another person. Could be practically anything.
4) Know that the information you are discovering in the first three pieces of this process are leading to your financial challenges in ways that you don’t have a clue.
5) If you haven’t done so, please invest in the book, Secrets of the Millionaire Mind, by T. Harv Eker. It’s the best book about there on financial beliefs and it changes people’s lives for the better when they consume it. Notice I didn’t say read it. I said invest in it and consume it.
I reread this book yearly and continue to learn more and more things about myself in terms of money, wealth, investing and a lot more. The deeper you go with yourself, the deeper you’ll be able to go the next time you take in the material.
Just something to think about!
p.s. If you really want to go deep, sign up for Eker’s Millionaire Mind Intensive Seminar. It’s usually free but in this case, you don’t get what you pay for. You get life-change in a big way and I highly recommend the program. I’ve been through almost all of his seminars and loved them. Learned a ton and am where I am partly because of his programs. Check them out…
by Elisabeth Donati | Feb 11, 2010 | Latest News, Uncategorized, WEALTHwork™
This past weekend, I had the privilege of seeing AVATAR in 3D at an IMAX theater. What a gift that was and I recommend it. I’ve heard stories of people struggling after seeing this film but truthfully, it is just a classic tale in so many ways. What makes it so beautiful is the environment that was created and the way the Pandorians (they lived on Pandora) live and interact with each other and with their environment (plants and animals).
The movie depicted human beings inhabiting their own ‘Avatar being’, in other words, when the humans connected on a brain level to their own Avatar beings, they BECAME that being and sensed everything their Avatar was sensing, experiencing the world as if they were that way.
The definition of an Avatar: the manifestation of a divine being into real life; the personification of a familiar idea. In our Creative Wealth programs we suggest that everyone has a ‘money personality’, i.e., a way of being around, and with, money. The idea of a Money Avatar is a little different.
The idea of a Money Avatar revolves around us first understanding our own natural tendency toward a certain money personality. In our programs, we use Olivia Mellan’s work for our four basic money personalities: Spender, Saver, Avoider and Monk. There a several more that she discusses in her articles and books, but these four describe the bulk of our money behaviors and actions.
Your Money Avatar
A Money Avatar, however, is who we WISH we could be. If we’re a naturally born spender, we might wish we had a little bit of the saver in us. If we’re a saver, we might wish we were a little bit more of a spender. If we are a money monk or an avoider, we may ache to wake up one day as a saver. The challenge is, how do we go from what seems to be the money personality we’re hard-wired to live into, and move into a completely different, and more financially supportive role such as a saver and investor?
Here are some steps you might take if you’re currently inhabiting a financial role or avatar that isn’t serving you and you’d rather play a different role:
- Take some time to deeply understand your current tendency; the money personality that is the predominant driver in your behavior, choices and habits. Do some research, ask yourself where the driver comes from and how the driver took up permanent residence in your being. You must understand both the conscious and subconscious aspects to this current Avatar before you can choose an Avatar that is more supportive of your goals.
- Next, study the type of Avatar you want to become. Study rich people, financially free individuals who live the way you’d like to live. And don’t make stuff up about rich people. Read biographies about successful people. Watch movies about their lives. A great way to learn about people with money is to take them to lunch! Ask them how they got where they are, what it took, what they learned, what their biggest lessons were. Don’t talk about you. You want to learn about them. Remember, it’s not what you already know; it’s what you’re open to learning that will move you from one Avatar to another.
- Now, start taking little bits about what you learn and start incorporating those bits into who you already are. Shifts don’t happen overnight. You became who you are over time. You’ll become who you want to be over time as well. It’s important to incorporate new habits, behaviors and choices slowly so they can seep into your being.
If you do these three steps, you will be surprised at how quickly you’ll wake up living into your new Money Avatar.
“I see you” in there! Go for it.
Just something to think about.
(and tell me what you thought of the movie!)
